On a recent visit to the Gaylord Opryland Hotel in Nashville Tenneessee, Tastes Like Travel learned (the hard way) that there are a few things you ought to know about this Hotel before you go. An idiots guide to the Nashville Gaylord would really come in handy here, but they don’t have one….yet.
This is a big place. A really really big place. I consider myself a good navigator. I can find my way anywhere, and once I have been there I can get around with out any problems. Exception to the rule: the Gaylord Hotel in Nashville. Did I mention that is was really big? After being there for a few days it occurred to me that almost everyone who stays in this hotel is lost, at least for the first few days. And while you are walking around this behemoth if you look like you know where you are and where you are going, people will stop you and ask, where the hell are we and where are we going? I managed, in the few days I stayed there, to get many people lost. A few trying to help them and a few just for fun.
I decided it was my civic duty to write this blog and help out those poor souls who are planning to come her get less lost. So here are the Tastesliketravel.com (idiots guide) rules for the Gaylord Opryland Hotel:
- Don’t arrive Drunk. It will set you back a few days and you will be gone before you know how to get around. Not Fun.
- Don’t get really drunk the first couple of nights that you are here. You think you know where you are but you really don’t so stay moderately sober. It is OK to get hammered in your room, unless your going out after.
- Get a map and study it. I mean like your taking an exam study.
- Don’t ask other guest to help you find your way. They don’t know where they are either and if they are drunk they may send you on a wild goose chase.
- Remember what the carpet looks like outside your room. There are 4 different areas with hotel rooms( Delta, Magnolia, Cascades and Garden Conservatory) and the carpet is different in each one. If you see your carpet, you are getting close.
- Write down your floor number. There is a 0 floor here and it gets really confusing.
- Look out of your balcony and see where the hell you are. When you leave your room put a beach towel or something on the balcony rail. While you are wandering around you might spot your towel and know where you are.
- Once you learn your way around, go the same way every time. this is not the place to go Christopher Columbus.
- If your here for a convention or meeting, start 30 minutes early or you will be late.
- Don’t fish in the delta river. There are some big ass bass in there but they won’t let you catch them